Living Through Long Distance

I met my girlfriend a year ago in a coffee shop back home. Ever since laying eyes on her, I haven’t been able to take them off of her. She’s perfect from head to toe. It’s funny how you can meet someone when you least expect it. Unfortunately, life doesn’t always make it easy to make a relationship work. I realized that the hard way on my first date with her, quickly realizing that we went to schools hundreds of miles apart. However, I wasn’t going to let a couple of plane rides come in the way of her and I. So, here’s how we deal with our long-distance relationship.

As you could probably guess, communication is really important. Whether that’s just simply sending a goodnight text or sharing what you did that day, every little detail is important to your significant other. Of course, FaceTime helps a lot. Getting to see their face at the end of a long day can make a bad day better, and a great day greater. She is always the first one I want to tell my good news to. As much as it sucks not being able to go home and see her face in person every day, the anticipation of counting down the days until we are together makes up for it in a way.

Each day apart is another day closer to being together. That’s the way you learn to look at it to make the time apart a little more bearable. Sure, there are the bad days where the littlest things turn into arguments, but after an hour you realize just how pointless the argument was and apologize. It’s sometimes hard to express what you’re feeling over text or the phone. To me, that is the hardest part. Sarcasm, emphasis, and true meaning sometimes get lost in translation. I have learned it is always best to talk through the problems instead of running away from them.

However, not all of a long-distance relationship is bad. I wouldn’t be doing it if it were. There’s something to be said about realizing how great somebody is by being apart from them for a while. You start to realize exactly what makes them so special and why you want to be with them. It also makes you appreciate the time that you do get to spend together. Breaks from school and summer vacation become even more special because you no longer have to spend time apart. The anticipation leading up to those final days of getting back to each other make every second apart well worth the wait.

Not only does being together make you feel happier inside, but the physical aspect of the relationship also gets a much-appreciated spark. Seeing each other for the first time in a month brings back those feelings that I had when I first laid eyes on her. We both tend to get a little more dressed up, almost wanting to impress one another like were on a first date. The butterflies come back when I step off the plane, and the ride home is almost unbearable. The thoughts start flying through my head: What will she look like? What will she think I look like? Will things be weird? Different? Is she still going to be attracted to me?

The simplest things like holding her hand or kissing her goodbye are what make being together so special. Date nights become a much bigger deal. Just physically being able to look into her eyes while talking to her is something that I wish I could do every day we spend apart. Looking through a computer screen just isn’t the same. Each and every relationship has its ups and downs, but it’s really up to you as to what you make of them. Speaking your mind and telling your partner exactly what you are thinking and wanting from them is very important. Nobody can read minds, so you need to be explicit. Be honest about what you are wanting from them emotionally, socially, and physically and take advantage of your time together (especially physically).

All in all, I really hate it when people say “long distance never works” or “oh, that must suck”. Yes it does suck! But would I change it? No way. Long distance works for people who make it work. Sure, it might take a couple extra late nights to make sure you get to talk every day and yes, you have to go months without the physical aspect of the relationship. However, the times and experiences you have together make it worth the wait. I believe it makes me cherish my girlfriend even more since I don’t get to see her every day. It makes me appreciate our time together more than I ever would have without ever doing long-distance. All in all, next time you see that cute person in the coffee shop, stop worrying about what could go wrong and start thinking about what could go right!