One of the terms you familiarize yourself with when you begin to decorate your own house is ‘aesthetic’. I have yet to make out a coherent idea of what it means for a living space to be aesthetic. Scouring Pinterest until my eyes glazed over left me even more aimless in imbibing the Nirvana-esque harmony that only living in such an environment could provide; however, I do think that I have a weak grasp of the guiding principles that can make your living space aesthetically pleasing.
- I) Throw everything out! Including yourself
If there’s anything minimalism has taught me, it’s an irrational urge to get rid of any clutter that passes my vision. There is an interesting dichotomy between the things you should get rid of in your home and the things you shouldn’t: you should keep objects that are visually unappealing and inconvenient to move, in order to achieve a look that is in direct contrast to what a ‘cultured’ or ‘normal’ person is accustomed. What do those louts know about comfort anyway? An ardent minimalist refuses to take the opinion of any plebeian that refuses to sleep on a bed made from pallets and crushed milk packages. An uncluttered space is an uncluttered mind. Believe me: you’ll never miss the color wheel once you decide to permanently switch to a monochrome color palette.
- II) Be practical! (unless being practical is unaesthetic)
There are many changes that can be made around your home to increase practicality and functionality. Take your refrigerator for example: it’s big, it’s bulky, and the thing manages to take up an obscene amount of space in a room that could be used for other activities. Is this really a price worth paying to keep your Cheetos cold? Of course not! Rip its doors off, and put it in your bathroom. Boom! Instant second bathtub!
III) ABC: Always Be Cleaning
Let us assume that you have created the perfect aesthetic for your home. Your primary goal should be to sacrifice any shred of dignity you have (even after hollowing out your refrigerator to make a bathtub) and spend the rest of your miserable life cleaning the space! Aesthetic demands complete subservience to the state (or the idea of a ‘clean’ house)
At this point, there may be an idea developing in your head of what “aesthetic” is. Well, you should completely erase it from your memory. As Pinterest explains it: aesthetic is supposed to be evanescent and nondescript. An aesthetic mind should be filled with blurs of pallets, string lights, vinyl players, and potted plants whizzing rhythmically to the tune of a pothead banging Djembes in a Swedish Post-Punk Fusion band. If you know and understand that orange and blue are opposites in the color wheel, you’re a lost cause. You might as well settle into a life of culture and comfort in conforming peasantry.
But at the end of the day, decorate your house the way you want to. Don’t go scouring Pinterest or Instagram for inspiration. Don’t spend your time creating someone else’s vision; live in your own one.