This Is Why

Why? 

Why didn’t I get it? Why didn’t I understand? 

You made everything so obvious! For months, no, years, you planned! 

I wanted that day to be just for you 

I made notes on everything you said you like to do 

Spa, movie, dinner, paid. 

Hours on the phone for each reservation made 

Out of three hours not one which you stayed 

It’s time I come out, I guess I was played! 

 

I tried so hard to make things work yet for some reason you didn’t give me time and now that I look back at it all everything is starting to fall in line 

 

6 years it’s been the first ones were great 

Every Friday we’d meet, go for a coffee, a “date” 

The laughter the smiles and even some tears 

We had each other to calm all the fears 

It was the ideal, it was so unique 

Refreshing, calming… 

 

But then came a leak 

 

Messages and calls, all were ignored 

All of our dates you seemed to get bored 

I saw you less and I couldn’t process 

All of your actions I just couldn’t guess 

 

When I finally spoke up asked what I did wrong 

You shouted at me as if I knew all along 

I tried to talk and I tried to make sense 

But you gave me so little as if I were dense 

 

What happened to you? 

What did I do? 

 

The final year went by so quick 

I didn’t keep well; my mind was sick 

I had given up and blamed myself 

All of the bottles fell off of the shelf 

You had taken your stuff, packed up and gone 

And all of my stuff was burned on the lawn 

It was only when I was wishing for death 

Did realization come in as sharp breath. 

 

Why? 

 

When I look back I see only my side 

I was stupid, ignorant, and so full of pride 

I had hurt you, ignored you, took you as claim 

I played you just like a game 

Everything but that day was only for me 

I guess karma does play part in destiny 

I swore against both and look what has pass 

It’s not a shock that they both bit my ass. 

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