LaVieEnRoux’s Two Brew Reviews: From Me To You So You Get Through

The Beer: La Fin Du Monde

This beer pours a murky unfiltered orange-amber with a two finger white head that drapes down the side of the glass as you drink The nose is malty and fruity with a slight citrus note. I had a good time smelling this one. On the mouth, there’s a slight tingle of carbonation with a smooth medium feel. The top-tier 9% alcohol content is completely undetectable, which is either very good or very bad. The body of this beer is medium and sits perfectly in your mouth, like you’re spooning somebody of just the right height. This beer has the characteristic spice of a Belgian trippel, with biscuity malts and a generally fruity undertone. No hop bitterness, just pure unfiltered beauty. Aftertaste is light and kinda feels like juice. La Fin Du Monde is fucking good. It’s really damn good.

The Sex:

This beer is good for when you’re hitting your late 20’s, you’re gainfully employed living in an apartment in the city, and you’re ready to settle down. You’ve been dating this guy for like 4 months and you really think it’s going somewhere, so tonight you’re gonna have some wild yet committed tipsy intercourse after your semi-fancy dinner date. It will probably be some of the best sex you’ve ever had, and honestly, you would be kinda alright with getting pregnant from it.

The Beer: St. Ambroise Oatmeal Stout

This beer pours almost as deep black as my heart, with a brown one-finger head. The nose is ripe with heavy roasted malts and a bit of chocolate. The mouthfeel has some light carbonation and a nice heavy body, which is pretty much what you’re signing up for with a stout. The taste is fully characteristic of dark chocolate and nuts, and just screams “aphrodisiac.” The aftertaste lingers with the bitterness of that weird high percentage cocoa dark chocolate, but still subtle. St. Ambroise Oatmeal Stout is about as pleasurable as your first coffee in the morning, and kinda tastes like it too. I would go so far as to say this is one of my favorite stouts, and I’m pretty peeved that you can’t buy six-packs of it in Wolfville anymore. Still, it’s a solid, deep, sexy beer, and it honestly turns me on a bit.

The Sex:

This beer probably goes well with forbidden, mildly kinky long-time-coming sex with your ex. Like, you’re about to leave your hometown forever and you both figured you may as well give one last kick at the can. It may leave a slightly bitter taste in your mouth and it may have reawakened some dark parts of your soul, but you’ll be damned if it wasn’t pretty good.

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