The Athenaeum

Tag: health & wellness

  • I Like Sex as Much as the Next Guy

    I have a hard time wrapping my head around why so many people almost go into shock when they hear me, a heterosexual female, openly talk about sex. Whether it be talking about having sex or things I enjoy during sex, the look on their faces is just sheer and utter appalment. It’s like they can’t believe that a woman of my age and relationship status is having sex and is willing to engage in open discourse about it.  Newsflash people: if a heterosexual or bisexual male talks about having a hook up or a friends-with-benefits with someone, there is generally going to be female counterpart.

    I guess I kind of understand the initial shock that comes with hearing a female talk about sex. Males have been openly talking about their sexual encounters for decades now, whereas females have just really started embracing their “womanhood” recently. But it’s time to get over this. Feminism doesn’t just apply to equal wages or equal voting rights. It’s also about sexual freedom and that anyone, no matter what their gender is, should be able openly and equally talk about sex without experiencing any discrimination.

    Don’t get me wrong: I am not saying that the reactions people give me when I talk about sex are inherently discriminating, but it is not the same reaction many of my male peers receive when they talk about sex. Let me give you an example: I have been asked numerous times by males about my masturbation (i.e. whether I engage in it and/ or how often I do so). First off, I want to start by pointing out that it’s not their place to ask that. Yes, I openly talk about sex if I want to do so, but it shouldn’t be anyone else’s business unless I decide to share it with them (being the Student Sexual Health Worker at Acadia has made this a little bit difficult though because I often get, “I thought you were open and honest about these things”). What really gets me, though, is how guys seem to get turned on when I tell them the simple fact that I masturbate. I mean, I don’t get turned on when they tell me that they masturbate, and I understand that people have different sexual preferences, but I don’t get why they act as though it’s so surprising that I masturbate. I can only imagine how they would respond if I told them about the other sexual activities I engage in.

    This article isn’t meant to penalize males by any means. In fact, I have found that even a lot of females give me and my other sexually explicit female peers questionable glares and remarks when they hear us talk about sex. From my experience, I have been the target of “slut-shaming” by more of my female peers than my male peers. Come on, girls! We need to stick together in this. If we are fighting for equality, you have to stop being so unaccepting of behaviours of your female peers that you readily accept for your male peers.

    What I’m trying to get across is that it’s 2017: it’s about time to accept the fact that everyone, no matter their gender or sexual orientation, should be able to talk about sex without it becoming a big deal. Besides, the best way to ensure that you are having sex that you will enjoy is to talk about it; talk about your likes and your dislikes, your turn ons and your turn offs, what you are interested in trying and what is a firm “hell no” for you. Just talk about it, for… sex’ sake.

    Full disclosure: this article is written from the opinion and experiences of a Caucasian, heterosexual female, and are only my own personal thoughts. I am by no means speaking for my peers who fall into these subcategories. I just thought some people might be able to relate to what I have experienced.

  • Unaware and Undiagnosed: Common Symptoms of PCOS

    After years of intense pain, dramatic weight gain, and missed periods, I sat in the doctor’s office for what seemed like the billionth time trying to explain my symptoms to her. “It sounds like you have polycystic ovarian syndrome,” she informed me.

    The months following included ultrasounds, even more pain, and one specialist informing me that if I just “lost the weight” then all my PCOS problems would be solved. For those of you who have never heard of this illness before, Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (or PCOS) is a hormonal condition where cysts grow on the ovaries and where there is a drastic imbalance of hormones. Although these cysts are relatively harmless, the side effects that come from them are not. Having polycystic ovaries could mean the development of issues such as infertility, cancer, heart disease, and stroke. PCOS effects approximately 10% of females, but many go undiagnosed because they don’t know what to look for. The lack of awareness of PCOS has the potential to be life threatening. So, from somebody who has the unfortunate experience of cysts growing on her inner egg cartons, here are some of the signs to watch for.

    Irregular Menstrual Cycle

    An irregular menstrual cycle is the top symptom of PCOS. Most females with the illness have fewer than 8 periods in a year, and some people don’t have any at all. I can remember a time when I didn’t have a single cycle for two years. While some readers may be thinking that I’m lucky, let me assure you that I am not. Missing that many periods is unhealthy, and it means something is wrong with my body. It also means that the longer I go without a menstrual cycle, the more it is going to hurt when I finally have one. This may not be true for every woman with PCOS, but for me the pain is so severe that I cannot get out of bed for the first few days of my period. It is a searing, migraine inducing, incapacitating pain that is persistent and stubborn. This pain doesn’t even have to be accompanied with a menses! It can happen anywhere at anytime, regardless of cycles. Irregular cycles, especially painful ones, are big warning signs for PCOS.

    Abnormal Hair Growth and Hair Loss

    Bearded ladies are real. Rose Geil, Harnaam Kaur, and Diamond Smith are the names of females in the media who have come forward with their full beards flowing, and each of them has been given a diagnosis of PCOS. While these are extreme cases, abnormal hair growth is unfortunately a top contender for the symptoms of the disease. That isn’t to say that hair growth is abnormal, because it is a perfectly normal function of the body. What medical professionals deem as abnormal is the growth of hair on a female that would typically be seen on a male such as the face. However, it could also mean that places where hair is typically seen on a female, such as legs and arms, grows in excess. This is called hirsutism, and it affects up to 70% of individuals with PCOS. But while you may be finding an excess of hair on other parts of your body, you may find that the hair on your head is thinning and falling out. It may seem like these two phenomena are opposing, but they are linked through the overactive testosterone that comes with the hormonal imbalance of PCOS.

    Weight Gain

    Many of those suffering with PCOS are overweight or obese. At the very least, there is likely some element of struggle when it comes to weight management. According to the International Journal of Obesity and Other Related Metabolic Disorders, half of those with polycystic ovaries are overweight or obese. Why does PCOS cause such drastic weight gain? Remember, it all relates with imbalanced hormones. PCOS makes it more difficult for the body to use the insulin that is produced which typically helps transform sugars and starches into energy. If the insulin isn’t being used, it’s being stored. This alone can contribute to weight gain. The build up of insulin is said to also increase the production of a hormone called androgen, which makes it even easier to gain weight and even harder to lose it. It is an ongoing struggle that could lead to many other medical issues such as: high blood pressure, heart disease, and type II diabetes.

    Psychiatric Complications

    While there are many other symptoms associated with having polycystic ovaries, the above are the top three that most, including myself, will experience. But these symptoms aren’t the worst of it. For myself, the worst part of PCOS are the mental health complications. The most common mental health concern associated with PCOS is depression. It seems that there is a strong link between hormonal imbalance and depression. Who could have guessed? Although not all who have polycystic ovaries will develop mental illnesses, PCOS does increase the likelihood. My mood swings are often out of control. I am easily irritable, overly emotional, and sometimes I lash out when I don’t mean to. While the physical pain of PCOS is overwhelming, the mental side effects are just as bad if not worse.

    Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome is different for everyone, and my experience with it will not ring true for all who also live with it. I am not an expert in the area, and there are many other symptoms associated with the condition. The above mentioned are simply the ones that are most prevalent for myself. But one thing that I am sure of is that there is no cure for PCOS. It is a condition that I and many others must learn to live with and endure for the rest of our lives. It is painful, incredibly inconvenient, and has intruded upon my life more times than I can count. It has put me at risk for various secondary health concerns and at times, the symptoms make me feel unfeminine, unattractive, and hopeless. But I am not alone, and neither are you. So, here’s to my cyster sisters! You are strong, you are beautiful, and you are capable. If you feel as though you may be experiencing symptoms of PCOS, please speak to a health professional. While the condition is not curable, the symptoms are treatable which is the first step of preventing even more severe complications.

     

  • Wax On, Wax Off. What Could Possibly Go Wrong?

    Hair removal is something that many men and women, myself included, strive to perfect. Whether it is through the drawn blood of shaving, expensive laser treatment, or painful wax pulling, we are all after that chic bald look. Some do it for their own pleasure, some do it for the pleasure of their partners, and some like me do it because they swear they can run away from their problems faster. I have been waxing my legs for almost a year now, and when six weeks post-wax arrives, I’m anxious to get them back in a salon again. The trouble, though, is that those services can be very pricey. To my delight on Christmas morning, I unwrapped my very own wax warming pot, complete with strips and various versions of goo to help calm the fire ripping little hairs from your body tends to ignite. I thought to myself, this is great! I’m going to save so much money with this! My mind happily skipped over the process of what it might mean to wax your own legs.

    However, Christmas day came and went and before I knew it, it was December 26. Around noon I decided I’d give my wax pot a go, since my legs were in dire need of some attention. The instruction manual was thick enough to kill a rodent if it was rolled up, but I didn’t let that intimidate me. In fact, to reduce the intimidation, I disregarded all those warnings and do’s and don’ts all together. What I don’t know can’t hurt me was my frame of mind. Besides, I’d seen the bored salon ladies do it dozens of times without so much as a second thought. This should be a breeze.

    I set up the wax pot in my bathroom, plugging it in and turning it on. After waiting a total of seven minutes I impatiently concluded my wax was never going to melt, so to ensure I hadn’t received a defect I consulted the instruction manual. As it turns out, the wax can take up to 40 minutes to melt. This was my first encounter with misconceptions around at-home waxing. I busied myself with other tasks, and finally my wax had become thin and pliable as the manual suggested. It was time to get to work.

    I threw my leg up onto my bathroom counter, and I thought to myself how lucky I was that I was flexible enough to get my leg up that high. But after about 30 seconds with my leg up there, I started cramping up and realized that maybe I wasn’t all that flexible. Oh well, no pain no gain. So, I proceeded to dip my fancy popsicle stick into the wax. It was pleasant to apply, warm and smooth, but when I saw that there was still a thick bubble of wax on the stick and tried to re-apply in the exact same manner, my skin felt like it was ripping away with the already cooling wax. Sweat began beading on my hairline at this point, and I knew it would be a long road from there.

    That first pull on the strip almost made me shit myself, and I had a wax strip that was hanging off my ankle with still half a pull to go. Tears blurred my eyes but I refused to let them fall. I swallowed the pain and decided there was no turning back, so on the exhale, off the strip came. After my first few attempts, the actual ripping off the strips was really not that bad, I will admit. I even got the hang of how to apply the wax in a smooth motion, and things were going great. This was until I was ready to start on the back of my leg. My hamstring was pulled, I was in a full sweat, and my hands were starting to shake. I realize this may sound like I was just being a wuss, but I have a high pain tolerance and can usually endure more than most. I turned on my heel with my leg in the air trying to achieve that perfect angle. My back arched at a ridiculous angle and the wax residue on the front of my leg was sticking hard, and fast, to the counter top.

    I applied the wax to the back of my upper calf despite the awkward contortion of my body, and reached for a clean strip. I lost my balance a little bit though, and the back of my thigh squished right into the hot wax I’d applied to my calf. This was becoming very messy, and now my leg was basically glued in a bent position. I checked the time; 45 minutes had passed since the first application of wax. My waxing appointments usually don’t take longer than 30 minutes. “At-home hair removal is the way to go!”, they said. “At-home hair removal is quick and easy!” they said.

    Balancing and juggling hot wax, applicator sticks, and cloth strips was becoming exhausting. My hands at this point were covered in sticky, unforgiving wax and there was so much residue on my legs that I was sticking to everything I went near. Finally, I finished my first leg. Out of breath, I took in my work. My leg was bald and beautiful, just the look I had sought after. Along with my hairlessness, though, were broken blood vessels, a bruise forming, and patches of fine blonde hairs I had missed but didn’t care enough to revisit with the wax. At least my skin was soft.

    All in all, it had taken me almost two hours to complete my at-home hair removal adventure. As I write this almost twelve hours later, my hamstrings are aching from the stretching and the skin around my ankles is still faintly burning. But my calves are smooth as hell in between the missed patches of hair. This experience made me appreciate the work those bored salon ladies do, but you can bet I’ll be facing this task again in about six weeks.

     

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